and told me i was brave
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
meeting my biological mother
most of you have known me for long enough…so long that you thought i would never complete this task.
well, i probably wouldn’t have if it weren’t for my mom…for her encouragement…and flat out…insistence. “Julien, it is time you met your biological mother, I think I’m inviting her to your birthday dinner.”
oh…okay
(inside secretly screaming: THANK YOU…i’m so glad i don’t have to do this on my own.)
and it happened. it really did.
and it was really overwhelming. I knew I would cry, I knew my mom would cry, I did not infact even think that my fathers eyes would blur.
There’s a lot to tell. I may update this section a few times.
For starters: I did cry, but there were ups and downs. We were all in the kitchen when the doorbell rang, the doorbell never rings…we actually questioned if that was the doorbell, i said it was, my brother said…maybe…my mom and dad said it was the television.
I got about half way to the front door before i burst in to tears and turned around while my parents and brother continued to the door, letting Paula and her husband inside. by the time i got to the front hallway it was packed…i couldn’t see her. she was hugging my brother, then my mother, then my father…and then finally everything went silent and we hugged.
and we stifled our tears in each others shoulders.
My parents had never met Paula before, they had only met my biological grandparents.
Paula Jones was in labor with me for 17 hours.
Her son, who’s ten years old now, and I were born at the exact same time…only 16 years apart.
Her son….that means I have a half brother (imagine someone that looks like me….out there…it’s something i’ve only recently thought about, a thought most people take for granted.)
so…it was weird…it was intense…it was more intense after she left…something i didn’t expect…there’s someone else in my life now…an entire family…added on in a day, grandparents, quazi aunts and uncles…half brothers…
THE BABY SHOWER
Eleanor is a beautful name.
Jacob and Suzie are having a baby.
I stopped by the shower for a moment.
I was still overwhlemed and contemplative about the happenings of the night before.
there are way to many female youngn’s floating around winston-salem and not enough of the male counter part:
it’s one of those days…
when i think…why bother…but i still have a few people who want to know…so i will tell them.
even if…i feel…i am not recognized…or appreciated.
odd.
i can’t locate npr on the dial today…that’s adding to the frusration. it’s 7 am that too is adding on.
what is it…good things don’t come to those who ask…or you should never expect anything?
eh.
this actually has nothing to do with what i will be…blogging about today…its just my occasional jealousy kicking.
